Sunday, January 27, 2013

The loser

In tennis championships, my favorite part is the runner-up’s speech.

And I love looking at the face of the loser right after the game. Or moments before it ends and yet the player already knows his fate. That blank, faraway gaze. There’s no hope there in the eyes, only acceptance of defeat. And holding his composure, there’s courage in there too.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Secret Santa

Got a package
All right, coming clean, coming out. Deep inside my steely exterior is a screaming fangirl.

See, there's this little thing called Cabin Pressure. It's as little as an airdot (as compared to an airline). And this little thing makes me happy—not just cheery, but truly happy. Apparently, a lot of others are being made truly happy by it, too.

Long story short, I joined in the fandom's Secret Santa thingy last Christmas. Now, as you all know, the holidays just passed and it's almost February. So I thought that's it, my Secret Santa either was sick, got the wrong address, or left me for another girl.

But then the universe was only testing my patience (because it likes to do that to people). Last night I received a notice from the post office. It required going to the customs.

To cut to the highlight of the story, my Secret Santa hasn't forsaken me.

Inside the package
...I think it's an utterly stupid idea for two reasons: one of which is obvious and the other of which is that Arthur is 29 years old. Yeah, this might be something only 15-year-olds engage in, but deep inside me is a 15-year-old beaming girl.

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

First of 2013

Last night you told me:
                                   tomorrow
we shall have to think up signs,
sketch a landscape, fabricate a plan
on the double page
of day and paper.

Bishop wrote about inventing, 'once more, the reality of this world' come first of January. And that's how we are, really, swayed by the promise of a new year. We're creatures of hope. And we are creatures of invention.

*

Mid-afternoon I had the singular pleasure of reading and drinking coffee. It all came together perfectly: the cool weather, the thrilling book, the hot brew, the silence. This was what everyone talks about when they talk about being away from it all, it all being the problems and worries one has to bear each day.

From my humble, unkempt room, I sincerely wish everyone I learned to love and be fond of, everyone that ever intrigued me, and everyone that helped alter my life in the littlest but entirely positive way, that they constantly retreat to that place where they can feel light and be away from it all.

Life may be a matter of perspective, but life can be blatantly ugly. In these instances, that we have the strength to endure until everything is better again.

*

If I may give a few tips (for what, I don't know— Maybe we could consider these as things I would've told my younger self):
  1. If you see something good in someone, tell them at once.
  2. Be yourself. No kidding. If you want that cliché rephrased: Accept you're awesome and the world just have to deal with it.
  3. It's harder to be kind. Bad girls aren't cool.
  4. You're only as smart as you're willing to learn.
  5. It's okay to be weak. Ask for help.

*

Happy New Year!